1960’s wiggle dress and playing dress up

1960's wiggle dress and playing dress up | www.eccentricowl.com1960's wiggle dress and playing dress up | www.eccentricowl.com One of the things I love about having a blog is that it allows me to wear and share things that I can’t wear for more than the time it takes to shoot the outfit, or I just don’t wear because… still trying to get over that inner fear of being different in public. This outfit falls into the former group (and maybe a little bit into the latter, but mostly the former.) The dress itself is made of material that stretches, but the lining does not. Therefore, the lining hikes up to just under my belly/over my butt when I walk, and it’s impossible to bend over or reach for things without lining-seams popping. I really need to just remove the lining entirely, but I’m too lazy and afraid it might ruin the structure of this gorgeous 60’s coat and dress set. 1960's wiggle dress and playing dress up | www.eccentricowl.com 1960's wiggle dress and playing dress up | www.eccentricowl.comI also cannot wear these shoes for more than 30 minutes without pain, now that I’m carrying an extra person. My hips also protest heels most of the time.

So the reality of today is that I decided I wanted to play dress up in head-to-toe vintage, and showcase a beautiful set that I rarely get to wear. I bought it while I was pregnant with Asa, on a guess that it might fit my not-pregnant self, and I’ve been hoarding it in my closet due to popped lining seams and reticence to let beautiful vintage see the light of day for fear of ruining it. And now, I’m back in my standard at-home-all-day pregnancy garb, which is yoga pants, a camisole, and a cute polka dot shirt. I kept the hair rolls and the lipstick, though.1960's wiggle dress and playing dress up | www.eccentricowl.com 1960's wiggle dress and playing dress up | www.eccentricowl.com 1960's wiggle dress and playing dress up | www.eccentricowl.com The only thing I can’t vouch for being vintage is these shoes — they certainly look vintage, but I think they’re probably repros. No idea, though; I thrifted them. The earrings were my grandma’s and the sunglasses are thrifted but also vintage.

Personally, I do usually prefer vintage with a slight modern twist, such as a graphic tee with a vintage skirt, more because it fits my lifestyle and personality better than full-on vintage all the time. But I have those days where I wish that people still dressed like this for grocery store trips, and thus… a blog post like this is born. 1960's wiggle dress and playing dress up | www.eccentricowl.com

Vintage dress & coat set, vintage glasses, and heels, thrifted | earrings, grandma’s | lipstick, Milani matte Diva

Do you wear vintage head to toe, or do you prefer vintage with a modern twist? (Skye, I already know your answer. Haha!)

I hope you’re all having a wonderful day! And by the way, I can’t remember if I mentioned: if you want to join in on my week of lipstick challenge, you can even though it’s late now — post to my Facebook wall, or hashtag #eolipstickchallenge on Instagram so I can see!

Happy Thursday!

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The Difference Between Pregnancy #1 and Pregnancy #2

Vintage Hippie Dress, Nude Lipstick | www.eccentricowl.comVintage Hippie Dress, Nude Lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com With my first pregnancy, I was one of those women that other pregnant women seem to love to hate on the internet. It was a very, very easy pregnancy. I had about 4 weeks of mild only-on-the-weekdays nausea followed by 2 weeks of get-up -too-early-and-you’ll-puke, and then after that… I kind of forgot I was pregnant. I felt great, I felt beautiful, I felt like everyone should just always love pregnancy no matter what. (well, okay; I didn’t, I wished everyone could feel the way I felt while I was pregnant with Asa, but I understood that wasn’t the case.) I only needed to sleep with pillow support between my legs at around 7 months, and had no ligament pain outside of that. I had very few food aversions (bread and peanut butter), had no “bad” cravings, ate everything, loved red meat, stuck to a mostly Paleo diet, and really, really loved being pregnant. Except for the last two weeks, when I had a bad case of PUPPS followed by 68 hours of nonstop prodromal labor. That, I wasn’t so fond of. Vintage Hippie Dress, Nude Lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com This second pregnancy, however… it’s like night and day. I’m 14 weeks in and still feeling sick if I get up too early. I already need a pillow for support at night, and when I walk, it hurts. I hate the smell of meat cooking. I can’t stick to a Paleo diet because I hate meat and also any veggie that is not artichokes, asparagus, or (homemade) french fries. I try making green smoothies, and my stomach turns. I’m tired all the time. I feel chubby unless I’m wearing something that clearly emphasizes it’s a baby belly and not a donut belly. I never forget I’m pregnant; it’s always there. I gag every morning for no reason, and several times I’ve almost thrown up (literally, the dry heave before the real puke) while changing Asa’s full diapers, which NEVER made me sick before. I hate water.

Besides which, this pregnancy seems to have made me into an antisocial grouch in many ways, but especially when it comes to attention from my husband. I feel bad, but I just want to be left alone, which was not the case with pregnancy number one. I’m hoping all of these things will fade away as I get more settled into the second trimester, but I was feeling better by now with Asa so I’m in that stupid land of despair where I can’t convince my pregnant brain that things will get better. Vintage Hippie Dress, Nude Lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com Vintage Hippie Dress, Nude Lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com So, I am trying to enjoy what I can. The fact that my pregnancy cravings for artichokes means I’m less worried about how much they cost, because when I crave this little healthy food, I’d better eat the stuff that does sound good. The fact that I can say “the baby wants it” when my husband asks if we really need more chocolate. The fact that I have a husband who is understanding of my no-touchy-ness.

But really, I’m already looking forward to labor. To having a newborn to nurse and cuddle and stare at. To not being pregnant any  more. To my clothes fitting again. Vintage Hippie Dress, Nude Lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com

Dress, vintage/thrifted | necklace/crown, c/o Oasap (old) | boots, JC Penney | lipstick, Milani Nude Creme

But, at least I can enjoy wearing fabulous vintage that I wouldn’t choose normally, like this dress, whose print reminded one of my friends of abstract Daleks. Which, being a Doctor Who lover, made me adore it even more.

What differences did you mamas out there notice between pregnancy #1 and pregnancy #2? The night-and-day quality of mine so far has everyone convinced it’s a girl.

Happy Tuesday!

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How to choose the right lipstick for your skin tone

How to choose the right lipstick for your skin tone

Lipstick can be really confusing, right? I’ve heard a lot of women say makeup is just scary in general, because how do you choose the right colors for you? How do you know what’s good and what’s not? How do you know if you’re a cool or a warm, a summer or a winter, a red-lip or a pink-lip? And how the heck do you even apply any of this stuff?

So, prompted by Mrs_French on Instagram, I’m hoping to help you be a little less afraid of choosing lipsticks, and figure out what color is perfect for your skin.

Disclaimer: I am not a makeup guru or trained in ANY way. What I know is from research, trial and error, and YouTube.

How to choose the right lipstick for your skin tone | www.eccentricowl.com

First up, figuring out your skin tone! I’ve always been a bit confused by this. I have heard a lot of different ways to figure out what you are — whether your veins look blue (cool) or green (warm) on your wrist, whether, when you squeeze your skin, it gets more pink (cool) or yellow (warm), whether you look better in blue-based reds (cool) or orange-based reds (warm), whether you’ve got more pink in your skincolor (cool) or yellow (warm), and my skin gives me mixed signals. My veins look blue, but I have pink cheeks. My skin squeezes yellow, but I can wear silver AND gold jewelry. Online quizzes tell me I’m warm and should wear earthy tones, but earthy tones don’t look that great against my skin.

So, how the heck do you figure this out?

Well, apparently there is such a thing as a neutral skin tone — that is to say, I have warm undertones, but I have light skin and look better in bright jewel tones, and can wear more varied colors than your average person. However, for most of you, if you aren’t aware whether blue-based or yellow-based colors will look better on your lips, the easiest way to figure it out is to see whether bright, sunny yellow looks better on you, or whether you’re better complimented by pastel yellow (or none at all.) The former, you’re probably warm-toned, and will look best in yellow/orange tone shades. The latter, you’re probably cool toned, and will work well with blue-based colors.

On to picking out a few lipsticks! I chose colors I had on hand to illustrate the better of the two and why, and while there aren’t HUGE differences in any of these colors (and I could still wear the less-flattering of the two just fine), hopefully it will help when you’re choosing your own shades!

1. Reds

How to choose the right lipstick for your skin tone | www.eccentricowl.com

On the left, I’m wearing an orange-based red (Nyx Eros) and on the right, a blue-based red (Maybelline Red Revolution.) I was able to see the difference better in real life, but hopefully you can see it too — the orange-based Nyx lipstick makes my whole face brighten up, diminishes the pinks in my skin, and even goes so far as to make my eyes stand out more, while the blue-based Maybelline tends to blend in a bit more, make my skin appear more sullied (and pinker in real life, but it didn’t show up here), and generally makes my whole face look a bit duller.

A great question that helps when shopping for reds is: do you look better in bright colors, or deep colors? If bright, go for a red that is similarly bright (think poppy-red for bright, or Merlot-red for deep).

2. Pinks

How to choose the right lipstick for your skin tone | www.eccentricowl.com

These pinks are pretty similar, but I thought I’d show how a very, very alike shade can look super different just by going one shade down and losing some pastel. On the left is the darker Milani Matte Diva, and on the right is the more pastel Maybelline Fucshia Fever. I was going to contrast a deep pink with a bright pink, but sometimes I think it’s easier to learn based on similar colors. The one on the left is more flattering to me, as a warm-tone neutral, because it has no pastel and is much more of a bright, true pink. The one on the right has a lot of pastel in it (it’s very, very barbie) and is one or two shades lighter, which tends to bring out more pink in my skin and make my teeth look yellow. It would look great on a cool, pale complexion though! One thing I also noticed is that in the left, my whole face looks warmer, while on the right it all looks cooler (no color correction here!).

For me, pink is almost the hardest color to be satisfied with aside from nudes. Darker pinks tend to blend in with my skin, much like the blue-based reds, while pastel pinks just make me look very washed out. The question that helps the most while searching for a good pink is: would this color look good on me as a dress? If yes, go for it! If not, pass. Or, if the color makes your lips look like they belong on a different face, it’s probably  not a good color for you. Haha!

3. Oranges

How to choose the right lipstick for your skin tone | www.eccentricowl.com

Believe it or not, you can probably wear an orange lipstick even if you’re cool-skinned. The trick is choosing a coral rather than a bright orange, and going for something that’s a bit pink or blue based rather than redder or yellow based. On the left is my favorite orange, a very red-based Wet’n’Wild Purty Persimmon, while on the right is the pinker Maybelline Coral Crush, which looked much better on me back when I was blonde. Orange can be very wearable if you know what to look for. On dark skin, tanned skin, or warm-toned neutrals (who are pale but warm-toned, like me) look for bright, true oranges with more of a red base than a pink one. On pale skin or more ashy toned dark skin, pink-toned oranges and corals tend to look better.

Once again, it’s the “bright yellow, or pastel yellow?” question. If bright, go for red-based oranges. If pastel (or none), go for pink/coral based oranges!

4. Nudes

How to choose the right lipstick for your skin tone | www.eccentricowl.com

Nude lipstick is by FAR the hardest of the lipsticks for me to choose. On the left is the first nude I’ve ever liked, Milani’s Nude Creme, and on the right is one of the first nudes I tried, Revlon’s Soft Nude.Because the nude on the right is more pink/pastel and in real life, my lips disappear and my skin gets pinker. I used to think I would never, ever find a nude lipstick that looked good on me. I had tried quite a few, and they all seemed too pale, too cream-colored, to washed-out, or too pastel to look good with my pink skin. I figured maybe I just wasn’t the right person for nude lipstick.

Then, I found the Milani lipstick, which is a nice brown-toned nude that is about the same shade as my natural lips, just browner. And I fell in love. So I have realized, the best way to choose a nude lip: rather than going for the palest nude you can find, such as a color that is close to your foundation or concealer, choose a nude that is one or maybe two shades darker than your foundation or your natural lip color. It will still work wonderfully as a nude, but it won’t wash out your whole face by making your lips invisible.

I mean, I still think I might be able to find one better than the one on the left, but overall… I can live with it.

So, hopefully that helps! I mean again, I’m not an expert. I just get asked for makeup help a lot, and thought I’d put in my best tips for finding a good lipstick shade. Don’t be afraid to try new things — you may just have to experiment with a few different shades before you find your perfect color! And hey, if it makes you happy, who cares whether you technically shouldn’t wear that color. Find the colors that YOU love the most, and just… wear them.

If you have any additional things to add, go for it in the comments!

Also, day two of the lipstick challenge has me wearing the nude, which will be up later with an outfit post.

Happy Lipstick Wearing!

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Vintage novelty-print, polka-dots, and purple lipstick

Vintage novelty-print, polka-dots, and purple lipstick | www.eccentricowl.comVintage novelty-print, polka-dots, and purple lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com This week, I discovered a new drugstore brand of makeup called Milani, whose matte lipsticks are kind of divine. I bought four in two days, even though I rarely wear lipstick, and… well… now I’m obsessed. So I’m challenging myself (and anyone who wants to jump in for however long) to wear a different color of lipstick every day this week (all seven days) including the four new colors I bought, plus three older favorites. You can see all of the lipsticks here along with the names and brands they are.

I decided to start out with this purple lipstick because… well… why not? Jamie of Petite Panoply has a killer lipstick game (like, seriously, black lipstick, blue lipstick… yeah), and has been inspiring me to step out of my standard rut of reds and mauves for more unusual shades. I originally bought this color for my mom, on whom it looks much less bright due to her darker coloring, but when I stole it to try it on, I knew I needed one for myself.Vintage novelty-print, polka-dots, and purple lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com Vintage novelty-print, polka-dots, and purple lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com I’m so in love. The matte shades from the Milani range tend to stay on a lot better than most lipsticks I’m used to, although this purple doesn’t fade quite as nicely as the pink that I got, probably because it doesn’t really blend as well into my lips, so you can tell more where it wears off. But it still lasted through breakfast and lunch (about six hours) before I needed a refresher, which I think is pretty impressive! Especially for a lipstick that costs under $7.  Vintage novelty-print, polka-dots, and purple lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com Vintage novelty-print, polka-dots, and purple lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com

I am excited to create makeup looks around the lipsticks for the week; I am probably most intimidated by nude lipstick, but I found a nude (Milani again) color that I actually love, so this week I’ll tackle wearing it without looking too washed out. I swore I would never be a nude lip person because the colors I’ve seen and tried have been so pale and unflattering, but now I’m a convert. Vintage novelty-print, polka-dots, and purple lipstick | www.eccentricowl.com

Dress, vintage/thrifted | cardigan and tights, target | belt, thrifted | shoes, Modcloth | lipstick, Milani Matte Glam | glasses, c/o Firmoo

What lipsticks do you tend to gravitate towards? Personally, my standard lipcolors are bright reds, bright pinks, or just clear lip balms.

Aaand there’s an entire post devoted to lipstick. Haha! I hope you all have a great start to your week! I promise my next post will not be all about makeup. I think.

By the way, I’m sorry for the slight out-of-focus full body images; they looked focused on my camera. Ugh.

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Friday Chat: The Privileged

I was a bit afraid to publish this post. I hope you all know my heart. The Privileged | www.eccentricowl.comToday, I want to pare down and have a chat. (Thus, a picture I posted a little while ago on Instagram with no filters and no makeup, because I think it’s appropriate and I am feeling too sick to do the planned bare-faced, jeans-and-tee shots)

I’ve been seeing some interesting comments (and gotten some interesting comments) on blogs lately in regards to having confidence and feeling beautiful, fit, pretty, or what have you, and it’s sparked my general need to rant today. Or, you know, present a more thoughtful blog post.

The comments I’ve seen bring up something called “the skinny privilege” or “the pretty privilege.”

This idea is almost always found on blog posts from women who are encouraging self-confidence despite flaws, women who are pretty, or have a relatively ideal body shape, or have a relatively enviable life, and the comments usually say something like this:

It’s easy for you to say “be confident” — you’re young, beautiful, have good skin, and have the skinny privilege. You should be more thoughtful about people who aren’t like you; it’s hard for people who have bad skin, who don’t have an hourglass shape, who aren’t fit, who don’t have money. How dare you say every person can be confident, you have no idea how we (the un-ideal body shape, skin type, lifestyle) feel and how hard it is for us to get over those flaws. You should have considered that and written a better post to include us, too.

I have gotten comments like this, I’ve seen comments like this on other blogs (some of them actually very polite and nice, some of them very snippy and irritated), and here’s the thing: I do understand. Sometimes, if you aren’t the ideal — you don’t feel beautiful, you want to be seen as more than just what’s on the outside, you get judged for not being what society deems “beautiful” — you get discouraged by a pretty woman saying that everyone should be confident in who they are and that every woman is beautiful in her own way. You’re annoyed because perhaps you know you aren’t beautiful or you never will be beautiful, and you hate it when you perceive you’re being told that beauty is the only way you’ll measure up. Beauty isn’t all there is to life. Youth isn’t forever. A model-esque body shouldn’t be the only desirable body.

But here’s the other thing: just because someone is thin does not mean they are or have always been confident. Just because someone has a socially-deemed symmetrical face does not mean they feel beautiful. Just because someone has rad makeup skills does not mean their skin is perfect. And, just because someone has any of these things does not mean they have always had these things. Sadly, the world still runs largely based on appearance, and women are highly influenced by that.

And I know so many women who have that thin body that society envies who have had eating disorders, who have been unable to gain weight, who have always been skinny, who nobody realizes have issues of their own, because they are “so lucky to be thin.” Women who couldn’t gain weight in pregnancy and feel that the small size of their babies was their own fault for not gaining baby-nourishing weight, who had to give up breastfeeding because of it; women who are told by one side that they’re so gorgeously thin, and by the other side that they need to eat a hamburger; women who are recovering from anorexia who still shy away from being told they look healthy, because all they hear is “you look fat.”

If you watch TV or just walk through a city, you see many women with fit bodies and pretty faces who don’t think they’re enough, or who perhaps haven’t shed their old selves — their overweight selves, or their acne-ridden selves, their too-skinny selves, or their ugly-duckling selves. Despite who they are now, they feel like who they were. Their brains don’t compute the changes.

I was one of those people for a very long time, and this is why I tend to write posts about finding your own confidence and being okay with your own beauty, or just who you are in general. This is why I have written posts acknowledging that I know my own value now, which can perhaps come off the wrong way.

But I have not always been what everyone would consider pretty, fit, or clear-skinned. I am not currently what society would call an ideal body type at 5’6″ and 174 pounds (previous to pregnancy); I will never have an ideal body shape because my breast-waist-hip ratio is more pear than hourglass. I have always had a curve at my belly, fat on my thighs, a bubble-butt, and a small chest. Even when I was at my thinnest, I still felt like the fat girl because I have a naturally curving body that jiggled even after drastic weight loss. I had acne through my late teens and early twenties, I was overweight for years, I have really bad eyesight, and I’ve always had bad teeth.

And I am not writing any of this for reassurance or compliments; I know my merits now, and while I’m still working on my body, I’m okay with who I am in the moment.

I am writing all of this because I think that those “pretty privilege” comments, while I understand sometimes where they come from, should perhaps take a moment to stop and think. They ask the blogger, in a sense, to quit judging based on the physical, yet that is exactly what those comments are doing. They are judging this person based on the physical — this person is what most would consider pretty, fit, or blessed with a more upscale life, so obviously they have never felt ugly, fat, or experienced lack of money.

And in a sense, they are body shaming, lifestyle shaming, or beauty-shaming people. They basically stipulate that because this person is beautiful, this person must be confident and is not allowed to have securities. Most of these bloggers are not writing body-confidence posts because they feel beautiful and know it; most of these bloggers are writing body-confidence posts because they either are not the ideal, even though they do hold beauty in their own way, or because they have not always been or felt the ideal, and they want to encourage others to start thinking positively. Or perhaps even if they are relatively confident in themselves, and know they are within the ideal of what society accepts as pretty, they are still targeted, judged and criticized because they have a natural belly pooch, or a curvy butt, have the inability to gain weight, or they choose not to shave.

Because of that, they write posts to encourage women of any shape, size, or looks to forget what society says, and rock what they have. They write these posts because they want to change and challenge what is shunned in the eyes of the world because it’s not considered beautiful. Or, they write these posts because, like me, they used to be the fat girl, the acne-prone one, the one who hid in a corner ashamed of her body or her glasses or her less-than-perfect teeth. And they want to encourage young girls not to get too down on themselves, not to feel ugly just because they’re not ideal, not to let model bodies and photoshopped faces influence them to set unrealistic or unhealthy goals.

What’s more, in the blogging world it seems as though there should be some consideration for the fact that these are personal blogs. That one cannot possibly write from every single perspective, nor should a person have to write from every single perspective, if they put forth what they believe with respect and as much clarity as they can. These spaces are personal blogs. Personal lives. Personal opinions. Personal style. Most posts written are not written with the expectation that everyone will agree, nor that everyone should agree; most posts are written to express thoughts that, while they will hopefully encourage others, are mostly meant to be applied to the blogger’s own life, friends, and perhaps blog-friends.

We all know our general demographic, who we interact with, who comments, what problems pop up in the lives of those who follow our blogs — I know that most of my readers are between 19 and 35, are mothers or housewives or young women interested in fashion, and mostly tend to struggle with the same things I do, or are interested in the same things I am. Body image, comparison to others, retro style, motherhood, confidence, etc. So, I write things that I hope will interest these people, but I also write things that are just heavy on my heart. Things that I’ve been asked, emailed about; things that have been mentioned in comments; things I see on other blogs that interest me.

And I know that what I write, how I believe, who I am, and what I wear will not appeal to every single person, so I don’t expect every single person to take my words to heart. I don’t write for everyone. I write for the people who need it the most. I write for the young girl who emails me wondering if something is wrong with her because she doesn’t have a boyfriend at 14, or the fellow mother who writes to say she struggled with the same body issues I’m going through right now, or the non-ideal bodied follower who is happy to have finally found a “normal-bodied-woman” who dares to wear vintage clothes.

And, I write for myself. I write to find release, to find new confidence, to exercise my skill, to see if there are others out there like myself, to share my life, to connect. I write to make friends. I write because it interests me.

So, the next time you read a post about body confidence from a woman who seems to have it all, remember this: she may not have always had it all. She may still be struggling with inner demons. She may still feel like the outcast even though she looks like the popular one. She may have friends who need to hear what she has to say. She may have followers whose hearts yearn to hear someone tell them they are perfect just the way they are. She may not be writing specifically for you, but she is writing for someone. And even if her life seems perfect, or her body is one you wish you had, or her face is beautiful, she may need to write it for herself. To remind herself that the person who critiqued her bodycon dress because she has curves is wrong; to remind herself that the person who yelled at her to eat a hamburger has no idea how hard she works to gain and retain just five pounds; that she can be what she wants, because she is who she is. That beyond the ideals of society, there is beauty in her that only she has; that even if she’s not the ideal, she’s still worth something to someone.

2007 1 2007 2 At eighteen, I was rising up towards 180lbs (compared to my friends, who were generally around 120 or 130lbs) and rarely let people take full-body photos of me. I wore baggy jeans, sweatshirts, and tee shirts all the time because I didn’t want to stand out, and I didn’t know what else a “chubby” girl could wear. Often, I thought I looked like a boy because people always told me I looked like my brothers (which, duh, siblings, but as a young, struggling-with-weight-and-prettiness girl, that was crushing to me.)

Take it from me, a woman who has grown from a plain Jane to whatever it is you want to call me now; I know. I know that some would say I have the “pretty privilege,” whatever that is supposed to mean. I know that I’m not bad looking, that I don’t have a bad life, that perhaps now it’s easier for me to be confident because my skin is clear and my body has adjusted to its womanly proportions.

But I haven’t always been who I am now. And sometimes, the old self wins. Sometimes that’s still what I see on bad days. Despite beauty. Despite a good life. Despite weight loss.

And those are the days when I want those girls who are who I was to know: it gets better. To know, they aren’t actually as fat as they think they are, or perhaps that what they perceive as unsightly extra weight is attractive to someone somewhere. To know one day they’ll wish they hadn’t spent so much time worrying about the lack of curve to their hips or the lack of breast tissue or the few pimples that popped up for a few years. I want them to know that beauty does not need to be defined by perfection. That beauty should be defined by themselves, and themselves alone.

The beauty of their face, their mind, their heart. Beauty that counts; who they are, who God made them. These are the things that matter.

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Disclaimer, you don’t have to be what society calls beautiful to still be beautiful, and while I do use “beautiful/beauty” in this post a lot as a reference to the outside, because that is how I’ve read comments directed at myself or others, being beautiful is not limited just outer beauty, but also inner beauty, personality, and your mind. I have met people who I did not consider attractive at first until I grew to know them as a person, and now in my eyes they are some of the most beautiful people I know. 

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